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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Story of one of my exes: Good could be better, learning how to learn

By Judah
Last night, I was enjoying my down time after putting in my 8+ hours at work. I was watching the Basketball Housewives show on VH1, and noticed Chad Ochocinco was making a guest appearance and hanging out with his brand new piece on camera. Something he said struck a nerve in me while watching and made me sit up and pay attention.

He told his new piece, “Baby you fine, no question. ... But I can help you get to that level of ‘God damn’ if we just change a few things here and there.”

Her facial expression said it all. After maybe a few seconds of silence, she said “I’m already ‘God damn!’”

Yes, this is a simplistic example and it is TV, but it just made me think about my experiences and how I personally receive and give game to those in my surroundings.

I used to date this girl…we’ll call her Beth. Beth was a sweet, honest, smart girl who I was seeing off and on for a good 6 months when we had time. I had been in my career for a good two years and had some life experience dealing with contracts, employment, benefits and salaries. As a result, when it came time for her take her own career to the next level, I wanted to give my knowledge and experience freely to her so that she had a basis of what the corporate world was like.

Anybody who is in it knows it’s a dog eat dog world. But I digress. Anyways, Beth didn’t take too kindly to me offering suggestions, or telling her stories about my time in the world. She took it as me telling her what to do, or that I felt she didn’t know anything about the real world. On the contrary, I just wanted to tell her about my experiences, so she could apply it on whatever level she needed. I knew she was smart and didn’t take her intelligence for granted, I just wanted to build with her so she could be a success.

Shortly after her outburst, I ended the “relationship.” I can’t be with a person who is incapable of learning. Personally, if someone has some knowledge in any facet of life, I’d like for them to give me all of the information they have to help me grow. I’m not one who believes knowledge should be power. It should be spread for the good of society.

When you are under the bosom of your parents, you’re expected to accept knowledge without question. These ideals or ways of thinking can be forced on you and often are, be it; religion, how to handle finances, dealing with people, or just overall game that will help you develop yourself for when the real world attacks.

Now once you enter the real world it’s a freedom that’s indescribable--a freedom that may give you the inclination that you already know everything there is to know about everything. There is nothing wrong with having the belief that you can make your own choices on your journey of life, but it is a problem when you become incapable of accepting new suggestions.

This can go both ways. It’s not just about a woman who doesn’t listen or want to listen—let alone learn, but about people who think they have it all figured out. Those people are the most confused and unsure within there own lives. Next time someone wants to give you some game on a topic, analyze it then go from there.


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